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| Now this tag line is actually truthful. It was forever ago. |
Part Two is Here: Solo
Solo came out last week, and it landed like the proverbial
turd in the punchbowl as the intelligencia—ahem, excuse me—I mean fandom—savaged the movie for not being
necessary, and also not being what they wanted it to be, a state of being that
can only exist in the intellectual miasma of the Internet. I’m speaking, of
course, about the vocal minority, out in force, clutching their lightsabers and
calling for the resignation of Kathleen Kennedy for “ruining Star Wars.”
Mind you, I’m not talking about people with legitimate problems
with the movie. If you don’t like the lack of tension, the uneven pacing, the
need to self-reference other movies in ham-fisted ways, I’ve got no problem
with that, because while I just don’t particularly care about those concerns, I
freely acknowledge that they are there and you are right.
No, I’m talking about these guys here, the Poisonous Minority that seems to be infecting all levels and areas of popular culture these days. I find this unfathomable in the extreme, and
if you’re one of the people who have been arguing for this, sit back, because
you need to hear what I have to say. Everyone comfortable? Got your fingers
poised over the keys, ready to ragequit? Okay, here it goes:
You’re now officially too old for Star Wars. There. I said
it.
