Horror
anthology movies are fairly uncommon, and I guess it’s because of the expense.
I mean, you’ve got to set up three different production crews, and much like a
literary excursion, not all of the segments are going to inspire thrills and
chills. Usually. There are some exceptions, and many of them have made the list
below. In thinking about this category, I ranked each segment by how
scary/creepy/effective it was, and then averaged the scores together to get a
single ranking.
 |
5.
From a Whisper to a Scream (1987)
This
is one of those movies that is hard to pin down, mostly because of a name
change from a title that made no sense (in this case, The Offspring) to another
title that made no sense. The initial directorial effort from schlock
sequel-meister Jeff Burr is an ambitious project, for a number of reasons. As I
mentioned earlier, anthology movies are hard on the budget. He also had the
stones to just walk up to Vincent Price and ask him to be in the movie. Burr
was already directing seasoned veterans, and Price was the marquee name, of
course (he later claimed he didn’t like the movie). Fair enough; he’s not that
great in it, either. I’m glad it wasn’t his final role.
As
the stories go, well, it’s a mixed bag, but they all have one thing in common:
their 80’s-ness is amazing and wonderful, in turn. The gore factor is high, and
everyone does a good job with the material they are given. Terrifying? Not so
much, but again, it’s a solid effort that plays homage to what we’ve seen
before. And when you compare it to some of Burr’s later movies for Full Moon,
well, it’s a real diamond in the rough.
 |
4.
Trilogy of Terror (1975)
This
television offering from Dark Shadows
producer Dan Curtis makes the top 5 by sheer force of will alone. Three
segments, all based on Richard Matheson short stories, adapted by William F.
Nolan and Matheson himself, and all starring Karen Black in the lead to help
maintain a thread of continuity. Curtis and Matheson were a force to be
reckoned with in the 1970s, each coming off of successful television series and
both producing their best work at the time. Even with the abundance of mid-70’s
kitsch beating you up one side and down the other (The Hair! The
Fashions!), it’s still a pretty potent package.
Karen
Black knocks it out of the part, playing four very distinct and different roles
in each segment. These stories basically rest on her ability to deliver the
goods, and boy, does she ever. Mind you, you’re probably going to guess the
outcome of at least one, or maybe even two of the stories, mostly because the
innovative little ideas (circa 1975) have now been done to death, forty years
later.
3.
Black Sabbath (1963)
Boris
Karloff was on a career high in the 1960s, putting his name on TV shows,
comics, and starring in movies alongside his friends, Vincent Price and Bela
Lugosi. They all had a chance during this heyday to make hay while the sun was
shining, and Karloff made the absolute most of it. Black Sabbath is one of the
many American International Pictures’ low-budget thrillers that came out
cheaply and quickly, but this quirky little anthology of tales had a few things
going for it. In addition to Karloff himself as the horror host and star of the
final segment, the whole shebang was directed by legendary thrillmeister Mario
Bava.
These
three stories are all very strong contenders and while they vary wildly in
subject matter, there is an overall consistency to them that really delivers.
Bava, of course, knows how to direct horror, and he can get more use out of a
green light shining on Boris Karloff than just about anyone. Of course, the
American version of the film had some scenes removed; violence and implied
lesbianism and prostitution. Oh, those wacky Italians, eh? You can find both
versions easily enough and make up your own mind. Either way, you’re probably
going to remember “A Drop of Water,” about a medium who dies during a séance,
for a long, long time.
2.
The Twilight Zone: the Movie (1983)
“You
wanna see something really scary?”
One
of the best openings to a horror film of any kind. Who can forget Dan Ackryod
and Albert Brooks discussing their favorite episodes of The Twilight Zone TV
show (and even confusing one of the episodes with an Outer Limits plot)? This
anthology paid due homage to the show by updating a couple of the most famous
stories and adding a few new twists, as well. There’s a framing sequence that
ties everything up, and wonderful, evocative narration by Burgess Meredith. It
should be perfect, right? Well, it’s not.
Four
amazing directors, each with a storied pedigree, were hired to produce and execute their favorite
“take” on what The Twilight Zone meant to them. John Landis, Steven Spielberg,
Joe Dante, and George Miller. Of the four, George Miller should have been the
weak link. After all, Landis was coming off of American Werewolf in London,
with several other movies on his list. Then there was Spielberg, who cut his
directing teeth on episodes of Night Gallery. And this was post-Jaws, post-Raiders of the
Lost Ark, and around the same time as Poltergeist. Joe Dante? He did a little werewolf movie called The Howling. And George Miller was the dark horse candidate, with
only two movies to his name. However, those two movies were Mad Max and The
Road Warrior. Awesome flicks, but hardly horror. So, he’s the weak link, right?
Nope.
Spielberg tanked it. It’s not that his segment is bad. It’s not. It’s vintage
Spielberg schmaltz, closer in spirit totem to E.T: the Extra-Terrestrial, rather than anything relevant to The
Twilight Zone project. It’s about the magic of childhood and it’s got cute
little kids in it, and Scatman Crothers literally
playing the “Magical Negro” part...ugh. Sure, there were some Twilight Zone episodes that had that
fantastical, idyllic message of hope in them, and Spielberg’s story just
manages to capture that vibe, but it’s really out of place amid the other three
director’s very creepy and downbeat segments.
Of
course, everyone knows about Landis’ segment involving the death of Vic Morrow and
the two children he was working with at the time. Because of the decision to
keep the segment in (albeit with a different ending) and because there was no
mention of Morrow’s death or the children in the credits, many consider the
segment to be in poor taste. Your mileage will vary. But the ending in the film
is more grim, and very likely adds to the idea of the ethical quandary around
the segment. Joe Dante updated Jerome Bixby’s “It’s a Good Life,” and
thankfully, it’s the “creepy kid with super powers” story we need to see after
Spielberg’s sugar-coated fairy tale. But the best one of all is George Miller’s update
of Richard Matheson’s “Nightmare at 10,000 Feet,” starring John Lithgow.
From
the opening scene of this segment to its inevitable conclusion, Lithgow is the
best thing in the movie. Totally out of control and also believable at the same
time. Better still is the updated gremlin, ably handled by Craig Rearden. If
you’ve ever seen the original, trust me on this, anything would be better. But
this take is a home run. And after the frame story collapses, we get one last
reminder of why the music and the intro to The Twilight Zone were so important
to setting the tone of the series, in form of classic narration by Rod Serling.
If you’ve never seen the movie, you are in for a real treat.
 |
1.
Creepshow (1982)
The
encapsulation of form meeting function, Creepshow was a major minor hit from
the get-go for a few reasons: George Romero and Stephen King, two of the
biggest names in horror in the 1980s, got together and decided to do an homage
to the E.C. Comics of their youth. So they took some of King’s short stories—a
couple of them had been published elsewhere, in small markets (“The Crate,” and
“Weeds,” which became “The Lonesome Death of Jordy Verrill”) and they adapted
them into short, sharp, punchy vignettes with histrionic acting, garish blue,
red, and green lighting, and wrapped the whole thing up into a comic book
format framing story from start to finish. It was exactly what it was supposed
to be, and no more. Bonus points for anyone who has the Creepshow
“novelization,” a graphic novel illustrated by Berni Wrightson.
The
all-star cast is awesome to see, probably most of all Ed Harris, who worked
with Romero a few times before his star power took over. His disco dance in the
middle of “Father’s Day” is priceless in its absurdity. Also on hand is Leslie
Nielson delivering a chilling, not-funny-in-the-least portrayal of a husband
scorned in “Something to Tide You Over.” Even E.G. Marshall, playing an eccentric
millionaire in “They’re Creeping Up on You,” is on target. Everyone just goes
for it.
Despite
the obvious comic book panel transitions and whack-a-doo acting during the end
of some of the stories, at least two (or three, depending on your sensibilities)
of the short stories really deliver the goods. “The Crate” is not played for
laughs, and is easily the best of the bunch, thanks to stand-up performances by
Hal Holbrook, Fritz Weaver, and Adrienne Barbeau. That is, unless cockroaches
bother you. If that’s the case, “They’re Creeping Up on You” will have you
squirming in your chair at the end. Actually, the end of the framing sequence
is the real kicker to the movie—easily the scariest and most effective of the
bunch, second only to The Twilight Zone Movie’s “Do You Want to See Something
Really Scary?” gag.
***
If you're just joining us: This is part of a much larger series of articles. You can find all of them here.
